David's Hat Factory

New Bombshell Beanie For Men Coming To David's Hat Factory Soon

2010-03-31T14:25:00.000-05:00

I spent a few hours last night and early this morning perfecting my new Bombshell Beanie for men. It is a crocheted beanie made with shell stitches and it is super cool and has tons of design options. I have one model made but I am not ready to give a visual to the world just yet. I want to make several of them and get them on the site before I make them available for purchase.

12 Squares Behind Uh Oh

2010-03-22T21:29:00.000-05:00

I swear I'm not lazy. I just got busy. Ok I knew this was going to happen lol. My goal was to make 2 squares a day for my colorful squares throw that I started working on. Well as always life intervenes and I got busy and just didn't have the time to make them. As of today I am 12 squares behind on my goal... but all is not lost I guess. I can catch back up tomorrow (maybe) if I make myself sit down and do it. Of course by tomorrow I will be 14 squares behind and so I'll have two more square to add to what I'm already behind on. We'll see what happens by the end of tomorrow...

Two New Squares And A Completed Custom Order

2010-03-16T23:12:00.000-05:00

I've got two things to blog about in this post. 1.) I've made two new squares for my colorful granny square throw that I started yesterday. And 2.) Today I finished a custom order and sent it out. I have pictures of the squares and of the two hats I made for Lee in the UK.

I'm only working with a few limited colors on the squares right now trying to do some stash busting (a term used by knitters and crocheters for using up stashed supplies of yarn). I'll add some more colors after I make a few more squares.

The hats were fun to make. These are the first two I have made with this particular stripe pattern. I love the way they came out. I can't decide which one I like better. I'm thinking I might have to make a red/black one for myself someday.

Well I'll be back to post two more squares tomorrow and I am working on one of these for my next order.

A New Colorful Granny Square Throw For Me

2010-03-15T09:26:00.001-05:00

I never have time to make anything for myself because I'm always so busy doing things. Well, I stumbled on something that has inspired me to take time out to make something just for me. I was looking around on craftster and I found THIS!!

Look at all of those beautiful colors. Anyone who really knows me knows that I am a color freak and this crocheted granny square throw created by adaiha makes me happy every time I look at it.... that is why I stole the picture to put in this blog post LOL.

Well, this adventure is not going to be an easy one for me because as a guy I am very impatient with projects that seem to take forever to complete. I have been crocheting since I was around 10 years old and I have never once been able to finish a handmade afghan. I have started many of them over they years but I would always get bored with them before getting very far. Well there is a "join as you go" method to putting this throw together that I hope will help me along the way with not getting bored. I wouldn't be able to do this if I had to sew all those squares together... I would end up pulling my hair out of my head before I finished.

The throw pictured above is a 6X6 square but I think I am going to do a 6X8 to make it into a rectangular throw. That means I will need 48 squares for my throw and my goal is to make 2 squares a day which means I can have all of the squares I'll need in 24 days with the last 2 completed on Thursday, April 8th, 2010. Then I can start joining the squares and hopefully have the entire thing done by the end of April.

I will be posting pictures of my squares as I make them each day so you'll have to come back each day to check on my progress. I am excited to see if I can stay motivated to start and finish my very first afghan. Check out my first two squares below.

And check back tomorrow to see what my next two squares will look like.

I Didn't Want To Do It But Now I Have No Choice

2010-03-01T20:03:00.000-06:00

When I moved to my new website where I would be hosting my hat shop I told myself I wasn't going to place image branding on my item photos. I just hate looking at photos online and seeing URL's and logo's pasted all over images. However I recently had 3 of my beanie pictures stolen from my website and someone was actually trying to sell MY creations. For this reason I will from now on be putting my hat shop's name and URL along with a makeshift logo that I adopted ages ago on all of my hat pictures.... at least the larger size ones anyway. It's the only way I know to deter thieves from stealing my work. So if you are like me and hate seeing text pasted on images I am sorry but I work very hard at making my creations and I have to take measures to protect my work and my reputation and keep my images off of other websites.

New Agean Stripes Ribbed Pattern Beanie Added To David's Hat Factory

2010-03-01T19:52:00.000-06:00

This is my latest 2X2 rib pattern beanie for men now available at David's Hat Factory.

Casino Royale First Color Pick And Patterns For New Slouchy Hats Coming To David's Hat Factory

2010-02-10T18:26:00.000-06:00

So, I still haven't come up with an official name for my new slouchy hat design, but I have been working on some new multicolor stripe designs for the hats. For these stripe patterns I have chosen a set of 12 colors. I have codenamed this list of colors as "Casino Royal". This codename is not official for the intended designs I plan to produce in the future. I am probably going to change over to some other weird movie theme set for the hats I'm going to produce. Casino Royal just happened to be the latest movie I watched when I started coming up with these designs (for those who don't know, I sometimes associate my designs around movie themes or movie characters because I love movies so much). Anyway I thought I would post these color picks and stripe patterns so my fans can get a small peek into my design mind. Please do not ask me for the actual stitch patterns for my slouchy hats and no I will not reveal my method of color picking. It is a trade secret. **smile**

1. Antique Teal
2. Black
3. Forest Green
4. Red
5. Sungold
6. Antique White
7. Toasted Almond
8. Soft Blue
9. Terra Cotta
10. Dark Olive
11. Burnt Pumpkin
12. Linen

CR015
-----

Round 1: Red
Round 2: Antique White
Round 3: Antique White
Round 4: Red
Round 5: Toasted Almond
Round 6: Terra Cotta
Round 7: Toasted Almond
Round 8: Sungold
Round 9: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 10: Red
Round 11: Toasted Almond
Round 12: Forest Green
Rounds 13-16: Terra Cotta

Drawstring: Solid terra cotta.

---------------------------------

CR014
-----

Round 1: Dark Olive
Round 2: Forest Green
Round 3: Dark Olive
Round 4: Sungold
Round 5: Antique White
Round 6: Sungold
Round 7: Forest Green
Round 8: Antique Teal
Round 9: Antique Teal
Round 10: Linen
Round 11: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 12: Red
Rounds 13-16: Antique White

Drawstring: Solid antique white

---------------------------------

CR013
-----

Round 1: Black
Round 2: Antique White
Round 3: Forest Green
Round 4: Soft Blue
Round 5: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 6: Red
Round 7: Forest Green
Round 8: Toasted Almond
Round 9: Dark Olive
Round 10: Toasted Almond
Round 11: Red
Round 12: Antique White
Rounds 13-16: Toasted Almond

Drawstring: Solid toasted almond.

-------------------------------------

CR012
-----

Round 1: Black
Round 2: Antique Teal
Round 3: Sungold
Round 4: Soft Blue
Round 5: Toasted Almond
Round 6: Forest Green
Round 7: Terra Cotta
Round 8: Antique Teal
Round 9: Black
Round 10: Linen
Round 11: Red
Round 12: Antique White
Rounds 13-16: Soft Blue

Drawstring: Solid soft blue.

----------------------------------

CR011
-----

Round 1: Red
Round 2: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 3: Sungold
Round 4: Antique Teal
Round 5: Sungold
Round 6: Antique White
Round 7: Terra Cotta
Round 8: Linen
Round 9: Red
Round 10: Sungold
Round 11: Linen
Round 12: Terra Cotta
Rounds 13-16: Linen

Drawstring: Solid linen

------------------------------

CR010
-----

Round 1: Black
Round 2: Antique White
Round 3: Toasted Almond
Round 4: Red
Round 5: Red
Round 6: Terra Cotta
Round 7: Terra Cotta
Round 8: Linen
Round 9: Terra Cotta
Round 10: Forest Green
Round 11: Sungold
Round 12: Sungold
Rounds 13-16: Red

Drawstring: Solid red.

-------------------------------

CR009
-----

Round 1: Linen
Round 2: Black
Round 3: Forest Green
Round 4: Toasted Almond
Round 5: Antique Teal
Round 6: Forest Green
Round 7: Sungold
Round 8: Linen
Round 9: Black
Round 10: Dark Olive
Round 11: Dark Olive
Round 12: Dark Olive
Rounds 13-16: Sungold

Drawstring: Solid sungold.

--------------------------------

CR008
-----

Round 1: Forest Green
Round 2: Red
Round 3: Black
Round 4: Antique White
Round 5: Linen
Round 6: Toasted Almond
Round 7: Red
Round 8: Forest Green
Round 9: Black
Round 10: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 11: Terra Cotta
Round 12: Forest Green
Rounds 13-16: Antique Teal

Drawstring: Solid antique teal.

--------------------------------

CR007
-----

Round 1: Linen
Round 2: Antique Teal
Round 3: Linen
Round 4: Black
Round 5: Dark Olive
Round 6: Dark Olive
Round 7: Forest Green
Round 8: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 9: Sungold
Round 10: Toasted Almond
Round 11: Terra Cotta
Round 12: Sungold
Round 13-16: Linen

Drawstring: Solid linen

---------------------------------

CR006
-----

Round 1: Red
Round 2: Black
Round 3: Terra Cotta
Round 4: Black
Round 5: Sungold
Round 6: Soft Blue
Round 7: Sungold
Round 8: Terra Cotta
Round 9: Sungold
Round 10: Terra Cotta
Round 11: Antique White
Round 12: Antique White
Rounds 13-16: Dark Olive

Drawstring: Solid dark olive.

------------------------------

CR005
-----

Round 1: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 2: Black
Round 3: Linen
Round 4: Sungold
Round 5: Sungold
Round 6: Forest Green
Round 7: Toasted Almond
Round 8: Burnt Pumpkin
Round 9: Black
Round 10: Sungold
Round 11: Dark Olive
Round 12: Black
Rounds 13-16: Red

Drawstring: Solid red.

---------------------------------

CR004
-----

Round 1: Red
Round 2: Sungold
Round 3: Antique White
Round 4: Forest Green
Round 5: Antique White
Round 6: Antique White
Round 7: Toasted Almond
Round 8: Antique White
Round 9: Antique Teal
Round 10: Red
Round 11: Black
Round 12: Soft Blue
Rounds 13-16: Antique White

Drawstring: Solid antique white.

-----------------------------

CR003
-----

Rounds 1-2: Soft Blue
Rounds 3-4: Toasted Almond
Rounds 5-6: Antique White
Rounds 7-8: Burnt Pumpkin
Rounds 9-10: Linen
Rounds 11-12: Black
Rounds 13-16: Antique White

Drawstring: Solid antique white.

-----------------------------

CR002
-----

Rounds 1-2: Antique Teal
Rounds 3-4: Toasted Almond
Rounds 5-6: Sungold
Rounds 7-8: Toasted Almond
Rounds 9-10: Antique White
Rounds 11-12: Soft Blue
Rounds 13-16: Toasted Almond

Drawstring: Solid toasted almond.

----------------------------

CR001
-----

Rounds 1-2: Sungold
Rounds 3-4: Forest Green
Rounds 5-6: Antique White
Rounds 7-8: Linen
Rounds 9-10: Antique White
Rounds 11-12: Forest Green
Rounds 13-16: Sungold

Drawstring: Solid sungold.

--------------------------

New Hats Coming Soon And A Price Change Coming On Some Designs At David's Hat Factory

2010-02-03T16:21:00.000-06:00

You have probably heard me mention in the recent past that I have been working on a new hat style created and designed by me. Well, good news!! I've finished making up about seven of them and I will be getting some photos taken of them very soon and will begin adding them to the shop. The best part is that these new hats are going to be a part of my first model specific designs geared for direct custom ordering. That is because these new hats are made in solid colors and the first custom order option for these hats will be for any solid color you choose for the design. I will be working stripes into these designs at a later time.

PRICE CHANGES: This is the only mention of a future price change I have planned for my 2X2 rib pattern beanies for men. The price on those hats will be increasing sometime over the next few months after I have done some maintenance work at David's Hat Factory. What this means to you right now is that those hats are now currently available at a great bargain so you should grab one or two up before the price change. I have no specific date for the price adjustment but it will happen before the fall season of 2010. They make great gifts, are loved by everyone who has bought one, and it is never to late or too early for any season to get one or give as a gift.

Well that is the latest update from your favorite hat maker at David's Hat Factory. Hopefully I'll get a sneak peek photo of the new hats up soon.

I Fixed My LapTop

2010-02-03T02:34:00.000-06:00

Great news I fixed my laptop. It took several scans of my hard drive with SuperAntiSpyWare, MalwareBytes, and my Eset Nod32 and then a brief internet connection troubleshooting with internet explorer to finally rid the virus and get the computer back online. As far as I can tell my laptop is completely clean of the virus and is running just fine. This makes me very happy for many reasons.... First, now I don't have to spend unjustified money to buy a new computer right now even though I still want that Asus Netbook. Second, I now have my favorite computer back in full operation with everything I use on it and still set up just the way I like it so I don't have to worry about setting everything up on a new computer or having to do a much feared factory restoration and then install all my software again. Third, everything feels normal again. I did not realize how important my computer is to me until I wasn't able to use it to it's full potential. I really need to get a back up of all my files incase I have another virus attack. I need to get on that pronto!

My Awesome Laptop Got Crippled Last Night

2010-02-02T11:28:00.000-06:00

I have a gateway laptop that I have been using for years... at least five years or maybe six. Last night I was surfing on a now known sketchy traffic exchange website and stumbled on some crazy website that installed one of those fake antivirus programs on my laptop. I should have known better than to keep surfing on that site but I didn't realize the danger I was putting my faithful old laptop in. I was just trying to gain some exposure for my my hat shop.

If blogexplosion would have approved my blog (I don't know what their problem is) then this probably never would have happened, but you can't ever be sure about things like that.

Luckily I have been sucessful in removing most of the virus that my laptop has on it, however I am not able to access the internet with it. I can thankfully still access windows explorer and will be able to get all of my important website files, pictures, music, and documents off of the hard drive before I attempt to restore the computer. And luckily I still have my desktop computer so I can still easily maintain my blogs and website.... So continue ordering as you wish. I still have access to the internet and if worse comes to worst I have my internet capable cellphone which I am using to type this post... so this little problem I have with my laptop being handicapped will not leave me stranded out in the water with no way of getting to dry land. It's a good thing I always keep at least one backup computer incase something like this happens.

I am making plans to get a new laptop (most likely a netbook) to replace my laptop but I need to shop around at different places to see where the good deals are. Asus has a cool 12 inch screen netbook and I believe my local BestBuy may have some in stock and I have been thinking about getting one so I may go out today and check them out. I may even get one today since I now need a new portable computer...

This kinda sucks because that was my favorite computer and now I can't get on the web with it but I will manage until I can sort the problem out.

Maybe I'll have that new netbook to brag about soon.

A New Look For The Blog And New Hats Coming Soon

2010-02-01T13:34:00.000-06:00

I got bored with the old template. So I've updated to a new dark themed template. I kinda like it. I especially love the skull background. I forget where I found that at but I think it's pretty cool and fits me well since many of my past templates have also had skull backgrounds. I may play around with the colors a bit and do another update soon but I like what I've got for now.

In other news, I am catching up on orders and I am also working on some new slouchy hats. I think I may have already mentioned the slouchy hats before but I don't remember haha. I have to come up with a cool name for them before I post them on this blog and add them to my hat shop. Oh and there are going to be three versions of it which I think is going to be really cool. There will be a slightly slouchy version, a super slouchy version, and a seriously slouchy version. I am currently working on the slightly slouchy versions now and I am doing one in all of my favorite solid colors. I think I have about 8 of them finished and I went out and bought more yarn last week so I could do more and hopefully I'll get them finished this week by Thursday so that I can get some photos taken of them and start getting them posted.

Well I need to stop typing and get to crocheting. Those hats aren't going to make themselves haha.

Rush Service Coming To David's Hat Factory Soon

2010-01-18T16:15:00.000-06:00

I am always getting asked how long does it take to finish one of your hats and how long will my order take. Normal wait time on orders usually run anywhere from 2 to 3 weeks. It can sometimes take a month if I have a handful of orders.

Coming soon in 2010 I am going to be offering what I like to call simply RUSH SERVICE. This will be a service provided at a $35.00 fee and the following is what you get with it.

Basically I drop everything in my life to work on and complete your order. I will turn off my computers, put my cellphone on silent, turn off the tv and do nothing but work on your order. No distractions.
If you purchase my RUSH SERVICE your order will be placed at the top of the list. In fact if I am currently working on an order when you place your order with RUSH SERVICE I will put the order I'm currently working on to the side and immediately get to work on your order. As a limitation to this rule, if someone before you has also purchased rush service then your order will be placed behind their order but still ahead of all other orders.
And finally, once your order is complete and processed you will be given RUSH DELIVERY at the post office free of charge. Note: All basic shipping fees will still apply to your order.

This new rush service is an option. It is not a requirement for ordering. This will be a great option if you need an order finished FAST.

This new service will be added soon and I will be posting more about this on David's Hat Factory website very soon.

What I've Been Up To Lately

2010-01-16T20:19:00.001-06:00

Hey everyone I thought I'd pop onto the blog to write a short note to let everyone know I'm still alive. Yep I'm still functioning lol. I've just been keeping it kinda quite. That is why you haven't been seeing me much on Twitter or elsewhere for the last week or so. I'm just kinda taking sort of a communication break while catching up and finishing orders so that I can get myself in gear to finish working on some new beanies I want to add to my shop and do some website maintenance over at David's Hat Factory. I know some of you guys miss me and I appreciate that... really I do but don't worry I'm still here. I'm just chillin' out and creating some more goodies for you guys.

Well if you would like to know a little bit about what is going on in my personal life I recently became reconnected with my childhood best friend. Actually we were young teenage buddies but whatever.... we were very young when we were friends. We lost contact with each other way back in the 80's when we were in 8th or 9th grade (I think). He went to a private school and I got stuck at my crappy public school and we never saw each other again. I never forgot about my buddy and always wondered through the years how he was doing in life. just recently on Facebook we found each other again. I can't tell you how cool it is to be back in touch with him and I'm looking forward to catching up on all the years that he and I missed while moving on in our lives. His name is Jamie and we were both kind of the outcast kids in school together but we banned together as friends and we used to have so much fun... mostly at his house because his parents were "cooler" than mine lol... I remember and miss so much all the times we would watch MTV or movies in his living room or dive in the pool in his back yard... all the sleepover's we had... those were the days. I am going to Atlanta in the first week of February to meet up with my old friend and enjoy catching up on our lives since the last time we saw each other. I think it is going to be so fun. Already it seems this year is getting off to a nice start. I couldn't have thought of a better way to start this year than by reconnecting with an old friend.

Well I'm off to finish up another order and I will be back on the twitter airwaves before too long. Catch up with you soon!!

PcTopher's Inspiring Weight Loss Story

2010-01-02T10:46:00.000-06:00

One of the cool people I follow on twitter just posted his story about his weight loss. I thought I would post a link to his blog so other folks can read it who might be struggling to lose weight.

Photos Of Me At Work Making My Hats and Beanies

2009-12-30T01:52:00.000-06:00

A lot of folks have been asking me if I had any pictures taken of me while working on my hats and I've been asked many times to post a few. I have finally gotten around to doing it and you can see the pictures by clicking here.

New Barbarian Beanie For Men Coming To David's Hat Factory Soon

2009-12-19T20:10:00.000-06:00

This is a sneak peak of the new barbarian beanie I designed today. I'll be adding this to David's Hat Factory very soon. This beanie is so soft and warm and it will be available in some very nice colors. The one you see me wearing in this picture is mine. You can't have it haha. I don't get to have many of my own hats because I always forget to make some for myself so I decided since this is one of my new styles I am going to keep the very first one for me.... but you can order one for yourself of course when they are available.

A Mobile Site For David's Hat Factory

2009-12-19T19:32:00.000-06:00

I found a pretty cool site that lets you build simple but good looking mobile sites designed for mobile viewing on cellphones. I thought this would be something good for David's Hat Factory since the wordpress template I use over there is not very mobile friendly.

Point your cellphone browser over to madhatter7zero.ubik.net to see my mobile site. Be sure to save it in your mobile browsers favorites so you can check in while your out and about to see what new stuff I got going on at my hat shop.

So I Am Taking The Plunge With Entrecard Again

2009-12-19T19:25:00.001-06:00

I hope I have better luck with entrecard this time around. Well I have a better blog now so things should be ok.... so long as the admin doesn't disapprove my blog because of that silly snow sculpture located elsewhere on this blog lol.

High Sierra 2X2 Rib Stitch Beanie For Paul

2009-12-18T20:50:00.000-06:00

I thought it would be fun to start a new kind of post where I give sneak peeks of beanies I am working on for my customers. This is one of my High Sierra Stripes 2X2 Rib Stitch Beanies. This one is being made for one of my customers and his name is Paul. I have currently only knitted about an inch and a quarter from the bottom but I am already loving how the colors are playing out. I'll post another picture soon of my progress. I hope to be finished with this by Saturday night, but since I work on the weekends I may not be able to finish it that soon. We'll just have to see what happens.

Daily Coupon Giveaways Coming Soon

2009-12-15T12:28:00.002-06:00

When I sat out to start my little business I had one goal, to be the one online top seller of hand knit and crocheted hats for men. I want to be the one artist every guy (and gal) comes to online for their custom made and pre-designed handmade headgear. I also wanted to the one well most known for, for not only being a great artist with my urban, hippie, artsy, collegiate, multistyle hats and beanies, but also someone who really appreciates his customer base (you can tell that through my personal interactions with my followers on twitter).

I am always looking for ways to increase my customer base, sales, and savings for my customers. My belief in this business is that an artist should be paid what he is worth for this work but there is nothing wrong with taking a slight hit on a sale by offering a discount to a few special people who really appreciate the discount in order to not only increase popularity for my products but just simply to put a smile on someones face while doing it.

So with all that said I will soon be issuing one coupon each day that has a 3 month time limit worth 20% off of an order at David's Hat Factory. These coupons will be a great way for those who request them to secure a special savings on their orders but not feel pressured to have to buy right away in order to get that savings.

I think this will be a lot of fun for me and my customers as well and also to my knowledge I don't know of any other online "handmade" type seller who has a coupon program of this type.

When coupons are available I will tweet a "coupon call" on twitter and there will also be a coupon request center somewhere on my shop's website (I'm still working on that).

One way or the other I intend to be better than the competition.

Pondering A Plan To Offer A "Earn Free Hats" Program

2009-12-14T22:06:00.000-06:00

I have been thinking of starting up a program that would offer a way for David's Hat Factory's biggest fans to "earn" a free beanie. I think it would be a win win situation for me and some lucky bloggers who participate.

It is pretty simple. A blogger would simply be required to display a standard 468X60 size banner at the top of his or her blog for a period of time. This would serve as free advertising for me which in turn would hopefully bring in lots of visitors to my hat shop but it would also be a very easy way for someone to earn one of my cool beanies for FREE. The length of time for the banner display has not yet been determined. I'm still working out all the small details of the program.

I would be very interested in knowing what you guys think about this. Would you participate if I create this program? Please post a comment and leave me some feedback.

Early Bird Sale Winner For Sunday 12-13-09

2009-12-13T10:51:00.002-06:00

Congratulations goes out to early bird @Danielb48 for being my early bird sale winner this morning. @Danielb48 snagged a great deal at David's Hat Factory with 30% off his order.

Follow me on twitter and you can have a chance to be an early bird too.

How early bird works: On twitter I send out early bird tweets early in the morning (if I'm awake) with an offer of 10% to 30% off an order at my hat shop. The offer is extended to only one person who can be the first to reply (DM) back to me the phrase "cheep cheep". Get it "cheep cheep" as in the sound a baby bird makes. Cute huh, yeah I know I'm cool like that haha. The early bird sale is a fun way for me to interact with my customers and a great way for you all to get a good deal on my awesome and very cool handmade hats and beanies.

Retro Modern Ombre 2X2 Rib Beanie Sneak Peek

2009-12-11T00:39:00.002-06:00

Here is what I currently have on the needles. Ombre yarns always scare me because you never know what the end result will be until you finish. This is something new I hope to add to David's Hat Factory. So far I like it.

David - www.hotdavid.com

Things We Have Learned At The Movies

2009-12-10T14:55:00.001-06:00

(NOTE: I am in the process of sorting content from multiple websites. This is a temporary post.)

Some of these are pretty funny when you think about how true they are.

1. If you try hard enough, you can outrun an explosion.

2. If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster or killer beast, the mayor's first concern will be the tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.

3. Natural disasters only occur after the local mayor scoffs at the possibility.

4. If an expert makes a prediction and is disbelieved, then it will come to pass exactly as he predicted. If he makes a prediction and is believed, it won't happen.

5. Women staying in a haunted house should investigate any strange noises while wearing their most revealing underwear.

6. Women's skin and hair can't be damaged by natural disasters, though their clothing can be shredded -- except for the bits required for minimal decency, which are made from completely indestructible fabric.

7. If a man and a woman are exposed to the same conditions and the same environment, the man will need to wear more clothing than the woman.

8. If a man and a woman meet under circumstances under which any two normal people would instantly hate each other, they will marry before the picture is over.

9. Deadly reptiles will always attack a woman first, even if she's in the presence of thirty men.

10. Women are immortal unless they take off their shirts or they're ugly.

11. If a woman takes a bath, bubbles will cover the naughty bits. If she takes a shower and reveals her naughty bits, she will die.

12. If a blonde and a brunette are in equal peril, the brunette will die.

13. White characters have the best survival rate.

14. High class strippers with a heart of gold can will, if the plot demands it, turn out to have specialized technical skills and abilities.

15. Most human action is initiated by shy loners.

16. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

17. It's easy to pull the pin on a grenade with your teeth.

18. An explosive device capable of leveling a large office building will fit inside a toolbox or small backpack.

19. Potentially fatal attacks are always preceded by a false alarm a few seconds earlier.

20. Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds -- unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

21. Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

22. A million dollars in cash or cocaine will invariably take up exactly the amount of space available in your briefcase.

23. The only people who ride city busses are "victims."

24. The universal medical procedure is defibrilation. Any time an EMT appears in a scene he/she will defibrilate someone before going back home. ER doctors defibrilate all patients, regardless of complaint.

25. If defibrillation doesn't work, the best way to revive someone whose heart has stopped is to scream "You can't do this to me! I love you, goddammit!" at them.

26. There are only a few real medical problems. Cancer means "I am being taken out of the plot soon and must tie up my affairs." Brain injuries and tumors mean the plot is going to hinge on amnesia. Bad skin problems signify the same character constellation that Elizabethans associated with bastardy.

27. A cup of black coffee/splash of cold water in face is enough to render the most inebriated person stone cold sober.

28. Creepy music coming from a graveyard should always be closely investigated.

29. All minorities possess mystical knowledge. If they wind up in a fight where their choice of method is either Western technology or somekinda mystical tribal thing, the fight cannot end until the former has failed them and the latter has been invoked.

30. The Chief of Police is always black.

31. If an investigation proves dfficult, a Chief of Police will either suspend his star detective or give him 48 hours to finish the job. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

32. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

33. During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

34. Action heroes never face charges for manslaughter or criminal damage despite laying entire cities to waste.

35. If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more ammunition -- even if you haven't been carrying any before now.

36. The more people there are firing at you, the less likely they are to hit you.

37. You can only threaten someone with a gun if you are within arm's reach of them.

38. If a man with a machine gun and a man with a pistol have a gunfight, the man with the pistol will win.

39. One man shooting at twenty men has a better chance of killing them all than twenty men firing at one.

40. The world's most accurate, easy-to-use weapon is the .38 cal revolver with a 3" barrel.

41. Guns are like disposable razors. If you run out of bullets, just throw the gun away. You can always find a new one lying around the next time you need one.

42. Give a man one gun and he's Superman. Give him two, and he's God.

43. No one ever aims at the legs of a monster that's chasing them. They just keep running away, pausing every now and then to pump bullets into its torso, until it overtakes and kills them.

44. No matter how dead you think you've killed a bad guy, he can still get up at least three more times.

45. Cats are spring-loaded, and are most commonly found inside closets or cabinets which are equipped with doors that can't be operated by cats.

46. The strongest force governing human survival is the possession of a name.

47. It is possible to use a helicopter to sneak up on someone.

48. A monster can always sneak up on you, no matter how big or clumsy it is.

49. It's easy to walk through an unfamiliar forest on a moonless night.

50. A leap from a hotel roof is completely safe as long as you can land in the pool.

51. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to handle realtime videophone contact, and can override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

52. Any self-respecting modem can handle about two gigabytes of data per second.

53. Interbreeding is genetically possible with any creature from elsewhere in the universe.

54. Attractive women sometimes fall for weird-looking aliens, but attractive men only fall for attractive women.

55. The feasibility of an idea is inversely proportional to its initial apparent plausibility.

56. All writers are wealthy; all publishing companies are glamorous; all artists are self-supporting and have large attractive well-lit loft studios.

57. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade -- no matter what time of year it is. If you can't find a St. Patrick's Day parade, try for a Chinese New Year celebration and hide in the dragon.

58. A pudgy older star who's visibly falling behind his partner during a chase scene will catch up with him while the camera's looking away.

59. If a gas station and a man with a machine gun appear in the same scene, before the scene ends the gas station will explode. The same is true of fuel drums.

60. If you are trapped in a tunnel, in a sinking ship, or a burning building, a cute little girl, a nun, and a feisty granny will be trapped with you.

61. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, provided there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.

62. The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there. And you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.

63. No ship, base, or compound ever has more than one emergency radio.

64. By the 24th century the concepts of circuit breakers, fuses, and uninterruptable power supplies will have been lost.

65. Although in the 20th century it is possible to fire weapons at an object out of our visual range, people of the 23rd century will have lost this technology.

66. In the future, everyone will spend their time standing around explaining everyday objects and practices to each other in terms of their Twentieth-Century equivalents.

67. No monster-killing stratagem can be used more than once, even if it only failed through some bizarre fluke. Neither can it be refined and tried again. You have to start over with a completely different approach.

68. No matter how badly a spaceship is attacked, its internal gravity system is never damaged.

69. All aliens have single monolithic culture: one language, one religion, one outfit, one planet.

70. Good chess players can see fifteen or twenty moves ahead, in detail, from a middle game, where there are still many pieces on the board.

71. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts -- your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

72. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war -- unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

73. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

74. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

75. You can see the Eiffel Tower from every window in Paris.

76. All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.

77. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

78. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.

79. The jungles of Vietnam were filled with Nautilus machines.

80. Stripping to the waist makes a man invulnerable to bullets.

81. Magical forces cluster in the visible portion of the electromagnetic spectrum.

82. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

83. If you have sex in the woods, you will die in the woods.

84. All beds have special "L"-shaped sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.

85. All grocery shopping bags used to contain a bunch of celery. Now they all contain a baguette.

86. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.

87. If there is a large bump in a downhill road, a speeding car will fly over it and hit the ground in shower of sparks. Unsecured passengers will not be injured, and no tire damage, broken axles, or suspension failures will occur. The car will then execute a sharp turn involving a skid.

88. If, during a fencing match, the combatants demonstrate their skill by cutting through all the candles on a candelabrum, the light level in the room will remain constant.

89. A slight blow to the head can cause total amnesia, but neither that nor a blow sufficient to knock a person unconscious is enough to cause concussion or other brain damage.

90. Losing a hand causes the stump of your arm to grow six inches.

91. Gunshot wounds will not disable you as long as you still have an important task left to do.

92. No one dies in an elevated position without falling from there to the ground, even if they have to jump to do it.

93. Anyone who falls from a high place while dying will let out a loud sustained shriek, even if they've just been shot several times in the chest.

94. No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

95. Any government-developed virus or biological agent will have no known cure.

96. An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur, will cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child.

97. Electricity will travel any distance through water to electrocute the villain, rather than go immediately to ground (e.g. a toaster tossed into the shallow end of a swimming pool will nail the bad guy over by the diving board).

98. You can only electrocute someone while you are looking directly at them.

99. Circuit breakers don't work.

100. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off -- even while scuba diving.

101. A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of RFK Stadium.

102. Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: Enter Password Now.

103. In you input a partial password on someone else's computer, the system will give you additional prompts that will enable you to guess the rest.

104. When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill -- just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

105. Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light instead.

106. If a phone line is broken, communication can be restored by frantically pressing the cradle switch and saying, "Hello? Hello?"

107. If there is a deranged killer on the loose, this will coincide with a thunderstorm that has brought down all the power and phone lines in the vicinity.

108. It is not necessary to say "Hello" or "Goodbye" when beginning or ending phone conversations.

109. During a very emotional confrontation, instead of facing the person you are speaking to, it is customary to stand behind them and talk to their back.

110. Answering machines do not have messages from aluminum storm door salesmen.

111. Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning even though their husband and children never have time to eat it.

112. Having a job of any kind will make all fathers forget their son's eighth birthday.

113. Incriminating evidence will always be found as photograph number four in a stack, or in the next to bottom drawer. Important data storage will have labels like "tape of Senator Foggbotham with underage girl" or "List of all nuclear launch codes."

114. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper cuttings, especially if any of their family or friends has died in a strange boating accident.

115. Villains are fond of explaining everything to anyone in sight.

116. Villains are improbably competent and inventive, but can only make money by pulling stupid robberies. They will risk everything they have and are to get revenge on some guy who once thwarted them.

117. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers and man eating sharks that will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

118. Any priest is either kindly or the villain. While nuns can deliver exposition, nuns are never villains.

119. Everyone knows the words to every song you want to sing and will sing along with you. They can even carry the solo part so that they can sing the song back to you, even if they have never heard the song until you sang half of it.

120. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

121. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

122. Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment.

123. Dogs always know who's bad and will naturally bark at them.

124. Most dogs are immortal.

125. Larry King plays himself.

126. You can stop a runaway car by crashing it into a wall at the bottom of a long hill, but not at the top.

127. The most unstable object in creation is a roadside fruit seller's cart.

128. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.

129. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

130. Light level is not a reliable gauge of whether it's night outside. You have to judge by the cricket noises.

131. You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

132. All loose ends are always tied up.

This page/post was created on Monday, January 5th, 2009 at my old site (www.jussbyoo.com - no longer in existance). It is here on Thursday, December 10th, 2009 in this temporary location until I find a proper spot for it.

Very Funny Those Damn Winter Drivers

2009-12-09T22:40:00.001-06:00

It happens to all of us...

You're driving along

just minding your own business,

when all of a sudden -

without any warning,

This Dick In A Truck

pulls out right in front of you......

Happy Winter Driving Season!!!

Please Be Careful Out There

and Stay Safe

Cause They're Everywhere!!!

Thanks to my friend Duane for emailing this to me.

Sunset At Long Cane Park Wednesday 12/09/09

2009-12-09T20:02:00.004-06:00

I promised you all on twitter a picture from the park today so here it is. Taken and uploaded directly from my T-Mobile MyTouch Android phone. This was taken just before the sun set at around 4:30 - 5ish p.m. Yeah the sun sets early in Alabama/Georgia in the winter. It sucks. The sky was beautiful though. This picture was taken at my favorite outdoor spot to go to. It is where I always go when I want to get away. It's at Long Cane Park on West Point Lake in West Point, Ga. I am eventually going to set up a blog specifically for my park photos but for now this one can keep it's home right here.

David - www.hotdavid.com

Testing Mobile Post

2009-12-09T00:20:00.001-06:00

This is a test post to see if mobile posting is working.

David - www.hotdavid.com

David's Hat Factory

New Bombshell Beanie For Men Coming To David's Hat Factory Soon

12 Squares Behind Uh Oh

Two New Squares And A Completed Custom Order

A New Colorful Granny Square Throw For Me

I Didn't Want To Do It But Now I Have No Choice

New Agean Stripes Ribbed Pattern Beanie Added To David's Hat Factory

Casino Royale First Color Pick And Patterns For New Slouchy Hats Coming To David's Hat Factory

New Hats Coming Soon And A Price Change Coming On Some Designs At David's Hat Factory

I Fixed My LapTop

My Awesome Laptop Got Crippled Last Night

A New Look For The Blog And New Hats Coming Soon

Rush Service Coming To David's Hat Factory Soon

What I've Been Up To Lately

PcTopher's Inspiring Weight Loss Story

Photos Of Me At Work Making My Hats and Beanies

New Barbarian Beanie For Men Coming To David's Hat Factory Soon

A Mobile Site For David's Hat Factory

So I Am Taking The Plunge With Entrecard Again

High Sierra 2X2 Rib Stitch Beanie For Paul

Daily Coupon Giveaways Coming Soon

Pondering A Plan To Offer A "Earn Free Hats" Program

Early Bird Sale Winner For Sunday 12-13-09

Retro Modern Ombre 2X2 Rib Beanie Sneak Peek

Blogroll Link Exchange

Things We Have Learned At The Movies

Very Funny Those Damn Winter Drivers

Sunset At Long Cane Park Wednesday 12/09/09

Testing Mobile Post